So, you’re thinking of having some photographs taken by a professional photographer? On behalf of us pros, thank you very much. But before your shoot comes around, here are a few tips to help us get the best photographs possible, without wanting to tear our hair out along the way.

I do stress that this is written in a very lighthearted fashion 😄

1. Event planners! We know that candlelight and low lighting makes even the dingiest of spaces look romantic, but please remember that we need a little light to photograph with. It’s no fun turning up to an event and feeling as if we’re about to go on a caving expedition. (Also, it’s none of my business but naked flames and free alcohol doesn’t seem like a great combination to me.)
2. So you’re getting married? Congratulations! But when you book a photographer for the day and tell them you only want reportage shots, please check with your parents beforehand. Experience tells most pros that at least somebody will want a formal group shot to send to Great-Aunt Bertha in Nova Scotia.
3. While we’re on the subject of weddings, there’s a reason most photographers pack up shortly after the first dance. When you’re planning a wedding, it might seem like a lovely idea to have evening shots of everyone dancing and having fun. Unfortunately, after a day involving copious amounts of alcohol, you’re more likely to end up with bleary expressions and dodgy grins. Let us pack up before things descend into madness!
4. Need some smart corporate headshots done? No problem, but do ask men of a certain age to invest in a nasal trim beforehand. I think most photographers can attest to at least one happy retouching session zoomed in on noses that they really could have lived without.
5. In addition in the corporate world, please do clarify what you mean when you ask for something ‘creative’. Do you actually want something a bit wacky or do you just mean you’d prefer a grey backdrop to the standard white one?
6. Many of us love photographing pets. But please do let us know in advance if you have a cat that hides the minute it sees a stranger, or a dog that has unhealthy interests in a photographer’s leg. We’re good, but it does help if we can actually ‘see’ the pet, or get it far enough away from our legs for a photograph.
7. Parents, we love photographing your children but please do our equipment a favour and let us know in advance if they’re going through a Vomiting Veronica phase. It’s not a problem, but it does mean we can bring our washable / wipe down backgrounds with us!
8. On the subject of siblings, it’s totally normal to have at least a couple of photos of the older child trying to strangle the younger in a friendly half nelson. Don’t panic – we have ways and means of distracting kids, although bringing a couple of their favourite toys won’t hurt.
9. And finally… no, I can’t make you look 20 years younger and 20lbs slimmer. I’m good, but I’m not a miracle worker…